Learning

I am in the middle of watching "The Digestion Sessions" series by Underground Wellness with Sean Croxton.  I don't feel "Aha!" when I learn something anymore, instead I see each of the "experts" Sean interviews as another player pushing against the darkness that keeps us in ignorance of how our bodies work, and it is interesting.  I respect them for sharing information with others, for learning and working the best they know how to help others and uncover truth, and I would love to join them. Maybe someday I can but right now I have three children and a husband to take care of, and my body is still recuperating from some major imbalances. So for now I keep learning and share what I learn on this lovely blog. Here's what I've learned this month:
The digestion sessions have led me to another theory about my current state of health. Dr. Kalish talked about H-pylori and how when you have that it causes ulcers and not enough acidity in your stomach.  If you don't have enough acid, you can't digest your food fast enough or efficiently, and it leaves the stomach at the wrong acidity level, doesn't trigger the proper enzymes, doesn't get absorbed by the intestines correctly, putrifies and causes diarrhea or bacterial overgrowth, which can lead to bloating, leaky gut, food allergies and chronic fatigue, etc etc.  I watched that lecture the same day doctor Smith called me back to talk about my MRI scan.  He said that all my valves, organs, and blood vessels between organs look good, but I do have excess food in my colon, and am I still having pain and do I want any further tests. So I asked him for one more test, an H-pylori antigen stool test.  He agreed and called that in, and referred me to a gastrointernologist for further testing.  I haven't heard back from the doctors office (two weeks later) about the antigen test, so I assume its negative, but Dr Kalish said it is rather difficult to detect h-pylori and sometimes takes 3 or more stool samples, and breath tests and stomach scopes don't always catch it.  So I decided to take some herbal antibiotics in oil form and Mastic Gum for 30 days and see if it helps.  I have the ulcers for a reason, yes stress exacerbates the bacteria that causes them, but it doesn't cause them, and if my stomach acid is low that explains why only eating small amounts of food at a time is the way to avoid adverse side effects, why my pancreatic enzyme levels are off, why I have so much excess food in my colon/intestines, why I don't absorb food well, and why I am so tired all the time.  I've been on various antibiotic oils like oregano for 10 days now and I'm feeling somewhat better lately, it makes me hopeful that I'm achieving some balance.  However, I need healthy bacteria to stay healthy, and who knows what I'm doing to that. 
Have you ever heard the story of the man and his son and the horse? It sums up how I feel about treatments, seeing another doctor, even learning new things that may or may not be accurate.

Once upon a time there was a man with one acre of land, one son, and one horse. One day his horse got loose and ran away, and all his family and friends said, "Oh! How unfortunate for you! That's your only horse, what are you going to do?" But the man just said "I don't know if its a good thing or a bad thing."
The horse joined a bunch of wild horses and became very thirsty. So the horse found his way back to the farm and brought 10 wild horses with him. All the farmers family and friends said, "Oh how fortunate for you. You now have 10 more horses! " and the man said, "I don't know if its a good thing or a bad thing."
One day while the man's son was out training one of the wild horses, the horse reared up and landed on the boy, and broke both his legs. The farmer's family and friends said to him, "Oh! How unfortunate for you. That's your only son. What are you going to do?" but the man just said, "I don't know if its a good thing or a bad thing."
The next week war broke out and all the able-bodied young men in the village were called to serve in the war.  The farmer's son could not go due to his broken legs, and all the sons of the village were killed on the front. All the famer's friends bitterly chided, "How fortunate for you, your son did not have to go to war." The man only replied, "I don't know if its a good thing or a bad thing."
After some time the farmer's son became very depressed because his friends had all died in the war and he had not been able to fight with them, so he left the farm and his father to find a better life. As neighbors wondered how he would be able to go on, he said "I don't know if its a good thing or a bad thing."
Five years later the son returned with a small fortune and a wife, and the old man was able to retire and sold his farm to his son who became quite wealthy. Though others looked on in envy, the wise man only smiled.
"I don't know if its a good thing, or a bad thing."

I have an appointment with the gastrointernologist January 28th.  My mom thinks I should keep it and continue seeking medical answers. My husband has declined to offer his opinion about whether I should keep it.  I am considering cancelling it and just continue learning about health and nutrition and being grateful I have the functionality I have. The doctors at the general practitioner "Premier Family Medical" have done a good job of convincing me there is nothing really wrong, or give me labels that aren't even true, and spending more money on doctors and tests just to show that I'm physically "normal" from every angle would be a bad thing.  But if I could find out more about my health or wellness by going, if I could learn what really is causing my digestive issues, it could help me to be able to better help others and share correct information, so it could be a good thing.